Feeling like a bad Mom

Do you ever feel like a "bad Mom?" I do at times. But this week, I really felt like a bad one.

What started out as an ordinary day. I had my breakfast, went to the post office and then to work.
about 10:00 am I get a text from my Husband for me to call home. At that point, my stomach fell in my lap because every time the phone rings and/or he needs me to call home, I think "oh Lord, something has happened to my daughter". Let me remind you, my daughter is only 3 weeks away from graduating from four years of College. I am a nervous Mom all the time anyway, However, I'm doing pretty good about that now. I don't worry about her quiet as much, ..OK yes I do.

Anyway, I called home. My husband said he has some bad news. My daughter had been in a wreck. she was fine and it was not her fault. Just shaken up a little and the police and ambulance are on the scene, she will have an officer take her back to school and she will call us when shes there. I was speechless for a second. My instinct wanted to grab my superman cape and head to Charlotte. She was only 20 minutes away. Im pretty sure I could have made it in 5.

My husband and I decided to let her handle this herself (his idea of course). She needed to learn how to get by without us just a little bit. After all , she was fine and this was not her first accident. The first one was below the house heading to high school one morning right after she got her license. I was at the scene before I could hardly get my clothes on. In fact, I think she was still talking to me on the phone when I arrived. That fast. ha ha. Again, she was OK it was a minor bump in an older car than she has now.

This time her accident was...well.... it could have been worst. God was there with her. She was in her little blue Focus. It happened on a busy hwy when someone hit her and took her across 4 lanes of traffic before halting in a ditch. So, now its the next day and I literally can not stop thinking about how she must have felt. How scared she must have been and I was not there for her! I am holding back so many emotions trying to come to grips. Me and my husband have even joked a bit about it just to ease our minds of the stress. But at the end of the day, I feel like a bad Mom because I was not there for her. She had to go through it all by herself. I should have been there.

We just got her this car 7 month ago :(
 
The next day, she said she was sore and now has a rental car so she can complete her internships and work schedule until she graduates. I am so proud of her. Even though we handled alot of the insurance needs, she did good at staying calm, giving correct information and paper work she needed. She is so smart and I hope she can stay out of troubles way for now on. I cant take much more.

I have to say during all this, I stayed calm (better than I thought I would) and was able to continue working the rest of the day. I had a scattered mind , but I made it. (Thats what bad Moms probably do).

We are going to go see her Sunday and I am sure I will give her a check up and kiss the boo boos if I have too.  I still feel awful. 



2 comments

  1. Lisa, thank you for visiting my blog and when I read this, I feel like we are connected at the hip! I too have a senior daughter in college (although she still has one more yr), she had a wreck in 2011 on a major interstate in Birmingham, AL while hubby and I were on vacation at the beach in FL and we were NOT THERE FOR HER. I felt the SAME WAY - BAD MOM OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!
    But what's even worse, we actually MOVED away from Birmingham in april 2012 and LEFT HER all alone there in school to fend for herself. we moved to Panama city beach, FL. I am def the BAD MOM OF THE YEAR!!! haha...but she has handled it so well. alot better than I thought she would and it's made her grow up which she needed and it made me cut those apron strings which I NEEDED. It's so hard to be a mom...........hang in there and thanks again for visiting my blog. I'm sure you'll get reg comments from me now. :-)

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    1. Im glad Im not alone! I ended up going to Charlotte to see her on Sunday and took her to lunch. She was fine. Not sore and not really even shook up. Shes just more concerned on whats next for a car. LOL. We were going to go on a trip tooo but glad we didnt!! Thats my fear is something will happen while we are on a vacation. eeek.

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